


Like an Anchor

by an7romeda



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Bittersweet, Complete, F/F, Hero Complex, Hurt/Comfort, One Shot, yes i used my oc's name but it's mentioned like twice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-28
Updated: 2016-02-28
Packaged: 2018-05-23 20:19:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6128903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/an7romeda/pseuds/an7romeda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Placed in-between DA2 and DAI, Hawke and Isabela discuss Hawke's hero complex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like an Anchor

Her hands were rougher than they used to be. Callouses on her palms from the few years she spent on her lover's ship. From grabbing the ropes to the melee fights where she mishandled the blades. She wasn't much for close combat. Anyone who challenged the mage won quickly. She had hidden her staff and armor down in the captain's quarters. The champion was sleeping down there, she always thought. Hawke, the Champion or the Destroyer of Kirkwall (depending on who answered), slept down there while she was Anya.

She wasn’t familiar with just “Anya”. She had always been a Hawke before she had ever been Anya. Though she made vapid attempts to establish her individuality, her family always came before herself. She sacrificed everything to gain them a home but in the end, they would always be vagabonds, apostates, and homeless. This was the legacy their father left behind. Their family meant something to Kirkwall again, and that was her mother’s legacy or…maybe their own. She was never too sure.

"Hey, you." The captain called with a sly grin on her face. Hawke turned and smiled to her but didn’t move from the side of the ship. Her arms crossed and a letter between her fingers. Isabela walked to her and matched her stance.

Isabela looked to the sea for a moment. Endless and vast, freedom in its truest form. Her home, her domain. She felt the sea as if the tides were a part of her. She shifted her gaze to the sky for a moment and thought about her lover’s silence. There was something wrong with both, she concluded in a few moments. The sky was gray and full of something more than clouds. It didn't seem to meet the sea on the horizon but rather as if it was pulling from it.

Isabela turned to look about Hawke. She slumped over the ship's side, resting her head over her arms. The captain outstretched her arm and touched Hawke's shoulder lightly. The touch made Hawke jolt to her senses.

"What is it?” Isabela asked. “You've got that look in your eyes." Isabela’s playful grin’s memory rested in the wrinkles of her face.

"Look?" Hawke squinted and Isabela nodded.

Hawke realized that she was referring to “the look” Isabela called “trouble”. When Hawke got "heroic" or "started taking herself to seriously", the look would darken and narrow her navy eyes. The look relaxed her smile lines and tensed her jaw. Isabela didn't like it. Hawke wasn't fond of it either.

"Was it in the letter?" Isabela tapped the paper with her index finger.

"No." Hawke sighed deeply. "I haven't heard from anyone in...too long.” Hawke trailed off, her eyes growing distant. Isabela moved closer to her and placed her other hand on Hawke's free one. "This is an old one and written by my hand."

"Who's it to?" Isabela asked, her voice hardly more than a murmur.

"You." She said simply. "It's actually a few letters. I wrote the first one when my mother died. It was the whole 'tell people what they mean to you while they're living' thing. Then I regretted not giving you it when you left and wrote another." Hawke sighed. "I thought it would've changed your mind or something..." She shook her head. "Then I wrote another in case I died."

"Why write all that down? You could just tell me or…show me." Isabela smirked and Hawke smiled a little.

"We've never been ones to be completely honest." Hawke shrugged. "I'm not sure if they're more for me or for you."

Isabela swallowed. She let Hawke’s words linger in the air before she spoke. Isabela’s eyebrows rose and her face felt uncharacteristically tight. The edges of her eyes suddenly felt like she had swam too long with her eyes open.

"Why do you have them now?" Hawke looked away to the sea when she finally spoke. "Are you leaving?" The boat rocked in the sea’s froth.

"I'm thinking about it." Hawke looked to Isabela. "All I've ever done, my entire life, is hide."

"Not true. All of Kirkwall knew you and what you did."

"I suppose." Hawke nodded. “Not that it did any good.”

"Stop with this nonsense and we'll go—"

"I received news about red lyrium and there is turmoil within the ranks of the Grey wardens. I think..." Hawke’s voice hitched in her throat.

"This isn't your fight."

"My brother is there. We saw the danger of red lyrium and its growing." Isabela opened her mouth to argue but knew better when her family was threatened.

"That's fine, you wouldn't have--"

"I love you, Isabela." Her hands were balled into fists. The confession coming out almost a decade after she knew it was true. "I know you don't believe in love. I didn't think I did either. But I know it's the way I feel about you." Hawke hung her head. "I'm okay with being the new tale of caution for your next lover." She swallowed, smiling shallowly. "I just can't leave and die without you hearing it from me."

"Do not talk to me like that, Hawke." Isabela hissed. "You will not die out there. You can leave; be my guest. Go dabble in diplomacy with the wardens and piss off your brother but you will not die."

"We Hawkes aren't exactly known for our immortality." Hawke coughed a little. It was supposed to be a laugh, Isabela was sure.

"But you are!” Isabela laughed lightly. “Your brother survived certain death in the free roads, and you on the run.” Hawke nodded along. Isabela continued. “Then, you will come back to my ship and make your way through the ranks."

"Can't I just sleep my way to the top?" Hawke said with her signature smirk.

"You did that last time. You'll have to actually work since you're going against captain orders."

"By leaving?" Hawke scoffed.

"By putting yourself in danger and interfering with matters that are not your own." Isabela said softly, gripping Hawke’s hand much tighter than she had ever. The pressure of their hands and Isabela’s shaky breaths told Hawke what she wanted to hear. This lasted for what seemed like an eternity and also, a second. Isabela regained herself and her charming smile. "Where to? I want to get rid of your hum drum as soon as possible."

Hawke chuckled. "Weighing you down, was I?"

"Like an anchor." She answered before tugging Hawke by the hand to her quarters.


End file.
